Understanding The AA Prayer: Applications, Benefits, and Hope
What you will learn
- The most commonly quoted part of the AA prayer is “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
- The AA prayer is recited before and after most AA meetings, and some apply it as a personal mantra or daily prayer.
- The themes of the AA prayer include acceptance, courage, wisdom, mindfulness, suffering, and surrender, all core themes of AA culture.
- Studies have shown that spiritual practices, like prayer, can foster a sense of purpose, hope, and social connectedness during recovery.
- Other common AA prayers include the third step prayer, the seventh step prayer, the tenth step prayer, and daily reflections.
The AA prayer usually refers to the Serenity Prayer, written by an American theologian, Reinhold Niebuhr, and popularized by Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). The most commonly quoted part of the prayer is this: “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
The principles of acceptance, courage, and wisdom are deeply in tune with the AA culture of accountability, holistic change, and personal betterment in sobriety. However, there are several additional verses in the complete prayer.
An Overview of The AA Prayer
While the opening lines of the Serenity Prayer are the most popular, the entire prayer goes on to include the following lines:[1]
“Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time.
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace.
Taking, as he did, the sinful world as it is, not as I would have it.
Trusting that he will make all things right if I surrender to His will;
that I may be reasonably happy in this life, and supremely happy with Him forever.”
How Does The Serenity Prayer Help In Addiction Recovery?
Reading through the AA prayer highlights the following concepts that are deeply aligned with the core themes of AA culture:
- Acceptance: Accepting the things one cannot change, especially in recovery, helps participants to admit they are powerless over unmanageable addiction, which is the first step in AA’s 12-step program.
- Courage: Change is difficult. It takes courage to change and overcome challenging facets of one’s life or identity or defects of character. Taking courage helps participants avoid self-pity and take accountability for their past while intentionally designing a healthy, sober future.
- Wisdom: Wisdom and discernment are learned skills that AA members cultivate in peer group meetings to help determine what events and circumstances can be changed and rely on a Higher Power for inner peace about the things that can’t be changed.
- Mindfulness: Living one day at a time helps one embrace the present moment and appreciate it for what is happening now, leaving the past behind and fighting back any anxiety about the future.
- Suffering: Accepting that hardships and suffering are a natural part of life, both passively and actively, is what paves the pathway to peace and contentment with life and recovery.
- Surrender: Surrendering one’s will and life to a Higher Power (or anything greater than oneself) increases one’s sense that all is right with the world. The prayer’s position is that it can promote both temporary and long-term happiness.
How Does Prayer Aid Recovery?
Prayer is often linked to religion and spirituality, but having a history or familiarity with these concepts is not necessary to participate in AA. However, prayer in general can have deeply personal and beneficial effects in recovery.
Studies have shown that spiritual practices, like prayer, can foster a sense of purpose, hope, and social connectedness while providing structure and comfort to reduce stress and anxiety.[2] All of which are core components of wellbeing and recovery.
History of The AA Prayer
Many ascribe the original prayer or poem to the 12th-century Catholic friar and mystic, St. Francis of Assisi. Additional resources reveal a similar version inscribed on a tablet as part of the Tannenberg War Memorial in Olsztynek, Poland. That inscription is credited to 18th-century evangelical pietist, Friedrich Otenger.
That tablet reads:[3] “God give me the detachment to accept those things I cannot alter; the courage to alter those things which I can alter; and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.”
All historic references aside, the version of the prayer that is used in the AA world is primarily attributed to Reinhold Niebuhr.
How Is The AA Prayer Incorporated Into Meetings?
In most AA meetings, the AA prayer is recited at the beginning and the end as an opening and closing prayer for the session. Some AA members employ the prayer as a personal mantra in their daily life, as either an evening or morning prayer or a meditative prayer.
Recovering from alcohol or substance use is a lifelong process. “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,” and the rest of the Serenity Prayer serves as a daily reminder of the core principles and overall purpose of AA’s 12-step program.
Are There Other AA Prayers?
Most of the 12 steps include a prayer as part of the theme. They’re all included in AA’s core literature, The Big Book:
- Daily Prayers and Reflections: Every day of the year, the AA website publishes a prayer or reflection accompanied by a quote from the Big Book, As Bill Sees It, or other AA curriculum. You can also go back or forward to view any reflection shared on any day of the year.
- Third Step Prayer (Chapter 5, p. 63): “God, I offer myself to Thee – to build with me and do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of Life. May I do Thy will always!”[4]
- Seventh Step Prayer (Chapter 6, p. 76): “My Creator, I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad. I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows. Grant me strength, as I go out from here, to do your bidding. Amen.”[5]
- Tenth Step Prayer (Step 10, p. 93): There are a few different versions of the tenth step prayer, with no one prayer being officially designated. The only prayer-adjacent concept that’s part of step ten in The Big Book is, “Not my will, but Thine, be done.” [6]
Experience The AA Prayer In Recovery
The AA prayer is more than a prayer; it’s a mindset. This mindset is particularly powerful for those in recovery who are attempting to overcome the past and build a healthy future.
Accepting circumstances one cannot change, courageously changing what we can, and cultivating wisdom to know the difference, is just good life advice. Find your AA community and experience the AA prayer in recovery.
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Frequently Asked Questions About AA Prayers and Meetings
Why Is The Serenity Prayer Important for Addiction Recovery?
Most people who attend AA meetings are in or have completed formal addiction treatment. However, recovery is a lifelong journey, and the support found in The Serenity Prayer is important for addiction recovery because it distills core themes of AA culture into a simple prayer or mantra that can be recited and memorized. It’s a tool to help cultivate peace and mindfulness and reframe hardships or past experiences to promote hope over fear or self-seeking habits.
When Should I Say the AA Prayer?
The AA prayer is recited before and after each meeting, but on a personal level, the AA prayer is appropriate any time. Many use it as a morning prayer or daily meditation or as part of improving mental health and wellness. There’s never a bad time to recite the AA prayer.
What did early members of AA study before the Big Book was written?
Before the Big Book was written, early and founding members studied the Bible. While it’s not necessary to be religious to participate in AA, there are strong spiritual themes found in their materials and in the meetings themselves. There are additional secular resources that approach the same principles with a less spiritual focus, but the core ideas are the same.
What questions should you never ask at Alcoholics Anonymous meetings?
The twelve traditions discuss some rules and recommendations for what to avoid in meetings. They mention religion, politics, treatment programs, other groups, and more, but it boils down to anything not directly tied to AA’s 12 steps.
What are the official AA resources?
Official AA resources include The Big Book, the AA Grapevine, and any materials on the Twelve Traditions.
[1]The serenity prayer. Archdiocese of Saint Paul and Minneapolis. (2019, December 23). https://www.archspm.org/the-serenity-prayer/
[2](PDF) rituals, religion, and recovery: Exploring the role of spirituality in mental health interventions. (n.d.-b). https://www.researchgate.net/publication/390340036_Rituals_Religion_and_Recovery_Exploring_the_Role_of_Spirituality_in_Mental_Health_Interventions
[3]ORIGIN OF THE SERENITY PRAYER: A BRIEF SUMMARY
https://www.aa.org/sites/default/files/literature/assets/smf-141_en.pdf
[4]Chapter 5 – How It Works – (pp. 58-71). (n.d.-a). https://www.aa.org/sites/default/files/2021-11/en_bigbook_chapt5.pdf
[5]Chapter 6 – Into Action. (n.d.-b). https://www.aa.org/sites/default/files/2021-11/en_bigbook_chapt6.pdf
[6]Step Ten – (pp. 88-95)
https://www.aa.org/sites/default/files/2022-01/en_step10_0.pdf